Manertainment

I don’t know if we are getting punk’d or what but Alec Baldwin claims he is writing a book on PARENTING!!! Yes the celebrity Dad most famous for verbally thrashing his then 11 year old daughter when she did not answer the phone when he called  can now give you pointers on when exactly you should call your kid a “thoughtless little pig”.  Alec says that “some people may find it ironic, but kids have too much power and call too many of the shots telling their parents what they will and won’t do.” Lucky for us Alec will tell you how to set their little asses straight.

With all the celebrity death going on lately we have almost forgot about the guy that got the whole Celeb death ball rolling last month David Carradine. The Medical Examiner hired by the family to conduct a second autopsy has come to the same conclusion that the Thai Medical examiner did a month ago. David did not commit suicide but died from asphyxiation. Now I’m no fancy medical examiner but I can tell you that often happens when you tie a rope around your neck and balls and hang yourself inside a hotel room closet. No word on the much rumored Secret Society of Kung Fu Assassins or Killer Lady Boys that may have played a part in the asphyxiation.

 Gary Coleman the cute tiny little black kid from the 80’s sitcom that wasn’t Webster, is back in the news today because his Amazonian wife went bat shit on him and was arrested for Domestic Violence.  She actually did not kick his ass, but locked him out of the house and proceeded to smash all of his stuff. When the cops arrived she told them to F Off until they drug her away. She claimed that Gary deserved it because he treats her so poorly..

Heroes Star Hayden Panettiere has the ultimate bad Tattoo. She had the phrase “live without regret” written in Italian inked all the way down the left side of her back. This would have been a great idea if the tattoo artist would have been able to speak and read Italian. He didn’t and he miss-spelled it. So now that her motto is living without regret and she has a HUGE REGRET Tattooed all the way down her back.  She tried to play it off by saying it doesn’t bother her at all since it’s on her back she doesn’t have to look at it all the time.  

Speaking of tattoos Rihanna may be in trouble for committing three misdemeanors in NY. Her crime is going in to tattoo shop where she has been inked before and tattooing three of the guys that worked there. It was caught on film and now that she has inked without a license she is being investigated..

National Enquirer must have Miss Cleo working for them because check out this Cover Story from Jan. 12th of this year!

“MICHAEL JACKSON IS DYING, AND MAY HAVE ONLY SIX MONTHS TO LIVE” was the Headline on the cover and here is the story. A SOURCE CLOSE TO JACKSON SAID ‘IT’STRAGIC. HIS CONDITION IS SO FAR GONE, I’D BE SURPRISED IF HE EVEN MADE IT ANOTHER SIX MONTHS. THE PAINKILLERS HE TAKES HAVE CAUGHT UP WITH HIM. HE NOW HAS AN ADDICTION SO SEVERE, IT COULD KILL HIM. MICHAEL IS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE, AND IT DOESN’T LOOK GOOD”. THAT WAS JANUARY 12th. THEY ONLY MISSED BY 8 DAYS CREEPY!!!…

Michael Jackson dying has not only consumed TV News and all the tabloids in the world it has assed D list celebrities from even being mentioned in the last week. However Former Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson had to fight to save a $120,000 deal she had with one of them to buy her Wedding photos. The deal was signed and then Michael dropped dead and they tried to pull out knowing that they would have to focus all their resources and cover space on Michael. Kendra had to get her lawyer involved and hold US weekly to the deal. That’s why on their cover this week it’s 90% a photo of Michael and his kids and a little sliver of a picture of Kendra and her husband Hank along the side.

Professional Hockey Player Mike Comrie is the boyfriend of Hillary Duff and probably the only Dude in the NHL who fake tans like a Metro Bitch. Mike and Hillary recently vacationed in Hawaii but reportedly spent all their time outside completely sun blocked out. Then when they got back to L.A. Hillary had a company come by and spray tan them at her home. I wonder what Mike’s Teammates would think of him getting spray tanned.

Jessica Simpson showed up yesterday in Maryland to sing at the National PGA Golf Event  going on there this weekend. She was wearing a red and black striped sun dress that showed off her full high beams and look DAMN!!!!!! Surely you agree with me that her boobs have NEVER LOOKED BETTER! Bravo Jess!

A great fight took place in Vegas over the weekend and it involved former Tennis Pro Anna Kournikova and some random chick at a bar. The girl was walking through the VIP room at Lavo when she bumped in to Anna and spilled some of her drink on her. Anna called the girl a “Fucking Loser” which prompted the chick to toss her drink in Anna’s face. Which is funny when you’re a drunk chick at a bar but Anna is still an in shape Athlete, so she pounced on the girl and pounded her in to the ground until security pulled her off.

Last week I told you about Leighton Meester the young hottie who is the latest celebrity to star in America’s Funniest Home Sex Tapes and now she has even more embarrassment over the leaked love making video. This week the show she is on Gossip Girls on the CW went back in to production. So far the only thing anybody on the set wants to talk about is her video where she gets some dude off with her feet and other body parts.

The Divorce between Usher and his wife Tomeka Foster is going to be ugly with Usher surprising her with divorce papers two weeks ago and now asking for a paternity test on their youngest son.

And now news that makes you want to blow your head off. Simon Cowell from American Idol is rumored to be getting a pay raise next year from $36 million a year to $144 million a year.

The Olsen twins are Billionaires due at least in part to their father David a Los Angeles Mortgage Broker. Now that the economy is in shambles he is reportedly about to lose his house. His famous daughters are said to be aware of it but so far have not offered to help him. They don’t like his second wife so instead they are going to watch as Dad and Step Mom start sleeping in their Beamer. Who knew Michelle tanner was so cold?

If you’re a Heroes Fan and would love to see the cheerleader naked your chance is coming next week. Hayden Panettiere’s next movie “I love you Beth Cooper” has a high school Locker room nude scene. Hayden plays Beth Cooper and if you’re willing to sit through a Geek has crush on Popular Cheerleader teen movie you can see Hayden’s Whozits!

Limp Bizkit was set to reunite for the first time in eight years next weekend in Vegas at UFC 100 weekend. However just when it looked like they were ready for their big comeback, comes news that they have pulled out of the show. The reason is not because the other band remembered that Durst is a Jack Ass but because they could not come to an agreement with the UFC over rights to a DVD of the performance.

Sorry did not get to post yesterday, I was busy working on the Jack and Stretch Show..Which by the way we are now running a behind the scenes look at here on Manertainment.  The Audio sucks balls on this test run but i will have it fixed by tomorrow. We have set up a Laptop to film everything that happens in the room on air and off from 8-10p Pacific M-F. The camera plays on the above video player. Also I am posting new stuff here a little later in the day now so check back mid day for the latest updates.

Convicted Girlfriend Beater Chris Brown showed up to the BET awards on Sunday Night because when it was turned to a Michael Jackson tribute at the last minute he was scheduled to perform. This did not set well with Rihanna’s mentor and friend Jay Z who was already on the bill pre MJ salute. Jay Z went to the producers and told them if Brown was allowed on the show he and wife Beyonce who was also slated to perform were leaving. Brown was quickly taken off the schedule. Jay Z’s people are not denying this story.

Mariah Carey is dressed in drag in her new video. The reason is they couldn’t get anybody remotely famous to play the part of the dude in this video. The song “Obsessed” is her reply back to Eminem for his song Bag Pipes where he bashed her and her husband Nick Cannon. The Mariah video is directed by Bret Ratner and originally had Andy Samberg playing the thug guy. Samberg pulled out of the video I’m guessing after he discovered it was an Eminem bashing video. That is when they decided hey let’s just put Mariah in drag. The makeup is actually pretty Good and has Mariah with a Gostee, the hardest part was finding clothes baggy enough to cover up her massive boobs..

 Last week I told you about the Former John Edwards friend and confidant Andrew Young’s book deal. The tell all is being pinned after Young took the fall for Edwards love child with Rielle Hunter. At the time of the baby Edwards was still in the hunt for the Democratic Presidential Nomination. Now some of the stories from the book have been leaked and they include alleged stories of how Edwards and Hunter once made a sex tape that Young discovered. However the lowest point of the book has to be when Young claims that Edwards and Hunter were planning a wedding once Edwards cancer stricken wife Elizabeth died. For the record Elizabeth is still alive and Edwards political career not so much..

News of Michael Jacksons death last week was first reported on Gossip sites like TMZ and social networking sites like Twitter. That has really pissed off main stream News outlets and Newspapers who claim they knew too but were waiting on official word because they are real journalist.  It has also sparked a new prank of falsely spreading word of other celebrity deaths. So far reps for Jeff Goldblum, Natalie Portman , and George Clooney have been bombarded by real journalists trying to confirm if their clients were still alive after reports of their demise spread online.

Last night was the BET Video awards and at the last minute they flipped it to a tribute for Michael Jackson.  The Highlight of the night was when Janet Jackson came out at the end of the show and tearfully thanked everyone for the support on behalf of the Jackson Family. She also said that everyone from the family wanted to be there but it was just too painful so they elected her. However her Dad Joe Jackson was there in the crowd and walked the red carpet before the show. where he did an interview with CNN. During the 5 minute interview he brought up his lawyer, his Publicist, but the strangest part of that interview was when in the middle of it Joe brought up some other old dude and said this is my business partner and we just launched our own record label, which he plugged like some low rent rapper announcing when his record drops.

Michael’s personal Physician who was the last person to see him Alive has now lawyered up and claims he did not inject Michael with anything before he died and that he found him in his bed in cardiac arrest. The family ordered a second autopsy over the weekend and we should now know a little more in just a few weeks.

  Jennifer Lopez has been laying low since the birth of her twins with Skeletor Marc Anthony. But she was out and about last week wearing a Super Tight dress and had a little bit of a nip slip. Unfortunately it wasn’t a bare booty slip..

Another Celebrity Death occurred over the weekend. That of the world famous product pitchman Billy Mays. Mays is the guy that you see at all hours of the day and night hosting infomercials and on the reality show “Pitchmen”. His wife found him dead in their Tampa Florida Home Sunday Morning. In a strange coincidence he was on the News Saturday Afternoon because he was a passenger on a commercial Jet that blew a tire upon landing and slammed in to the runway. Mays was interviewed where he talked about everything falling from the overhead compartments on to his head but he said “It’s Ok I have a hard head.” Then hours later he was dead.

And finally Philadelphia Eagle Hank Basket finally married Former Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson in Los Angeles on Saturday. The Ceremony took place at the Playboy Mansion which makes me wonder, would you have your wedding at the house of the 80 year old dude that used to bang your girlfriend? I didn’t think so.

LA county Coroner’s Office just said in a press conference.  Results Deferred- That means they need more testing on toxicology etc. This will take another 6 weeks or so. The LAPD also has an investigation going on so they did not say much else.

The Autopsy was three hours long and the body had no signs of external trauma and no signs of foul  play!

Last Photo of Michael Jackson Alive in transport to UCLA Medical Center.

The World is still consumed with the death of Michael Jackson so here is what we know at this point. Michael was last on stage just hours before his death. That was Wed. night at the Staples center in Los Angeles where he was practicing for the 50 show appearance in London that was scheduled to start in a couple weeks. Michael’s personal physician was at his home yesterday morning and reportedly gave him a large injection of the pan killer Demerol moments before he went in to cardiac arrest. After the injection his breathing became shallow until it stopped completely as he went in to full Cardiac and respiratory arrest. The Doctor started CPR and it took 8 minutes for paramedics to arrive. They found him with no pulse but continued the CPR all the way to UCLA Medical center where they continued to work on him for another hour but were never able to resuscitate him. Some of his family arrived at the hospital where brother Jermaine finally confirmed at a press conference that Michael had passed away. His body was flown by LA County Sheriff Helicopter to the Coroner’s Office downtown where an autopsy is being performed today. His two eldest children are expected to go at least temporarily to their biological mother Debbie Rowe and the Promoter of the London Shows is said to be out around $40 million in cash advances and production costs.

 Yesterday hours before Michael Jackson died, 70’s Sex Symbol Farah Fawcett also died after a three year battle with cancer. She was surrounded by family and friends. Her only son Redmond was not there because he is currently incarcerated by the state of California on drug charges.

Mel Gibson has cooled off on plans to marry his knocked up Russian Girlfriend. Instead he is keeping her happy the way any Sugar Daddy would….by buying her stuff, lots of stuff, lots of expensive stuff.  Mel recently purchased a $2.4 million dollar house for her, a new Mercedes SUV, and a 3 carat diamond ring. Mel has also put her on a $10,000 a month allowance. If Mel takes the kid on Maury later and the DNA does not match up, you can bet all that stuff will be gone and Oksana will be back in Siberia faster than you can say “Sugar Tits”.

47 year old Sheryl Crow is said to be hooking up with 38 year old Kid Rock. The pair has worked together before on the hit single “Picture”. They have messed around on the down low for years but lately have had some public displays of affection that have started the rumors. Looks like Kid may have finally given up on chicks that look like strippers.